pray please

[Jessie]

ok where to start?

(sigh)......

tomarrow is the funeral. I dont think I will go.
2 of my sons are helping the funeral people mom asked them to be pall bearers which thats not that really. when they found out, they were like dont they pay those people to do this?
its a grave side service the old time way.(as shes had nothing to do with them for yrs) so...

my husband is off his rocker again. fighting, hitting, you name it.
the finger, names... its a wonder I dont have a black eye right now.

frankly I just dont care anymore. not even a little bit.
(as far as hes concerned)
he wants to end up in hell so be it.
I just dont care.

(havent said anything about that to him anyhow or tried to talk with him concerning God)

I've been stuck between 3 familys having the XXX emotionally and phycially beat out of me, and I just dont want anything to do with anyone anymore.

did tell him you just could'nt let them get her in the ground before you started your #(#(#.

so I'm looking for a job and leaving... hes going to kill someone its just time.

if I had divorce papers set in front of me I'd sign them.

please pray for my safety and my sons and that I'd get a job,
frankly I'd love some money (if God would provide) so I could just
leave on his days off this week end. but thats a fantasy.

what a life....

[roman8]

What an awful situation Jessie , Will be praying for you.:pray::hug:

[a.baker]

Yes that is horrible! :pray: :hug: God will deliver something.

[InTheWind]

Praying for ya Jessie. :pray:

[kay-gee]

Jessie Jessie...when will this ever end? I worry about you. Will pray

all the best...

[CoreIssue]

:pray:

[Jessie]

doing better.

very peaceful this morning while the funeral was happening.
I was'nt there.

I have come to the point after praying for all my life for family that you here are my family. (except my sons) and God has said NO to the rest.

I had a thing on the wall saying that God answers in his own time.
yes he sure does. but for family the answer for me is a big NO.

made me upset when I realized that. but its sinking in....
so no it is. and its making it easier to disconnect from it.

my husband kept saying you want to kiss my feet, I know you do. (sick)


I told him no you have your life I have mine now. over and done with.
I want nothing from him... and frankly its rather freeing at this point.

he is making me look like the bad one in front of the kids.
like hes the victim.

all he can say is "well, it made me angry, you made me angry,"
well, all I can say is too bad. so who cares your angry?
I certainly dont.
anger anger anger anger...
one tries to fix things for him if he does'nt like it, hes still angry.
told him I'm sure you can find someone else to kiss your feet, (which I never did)
even in a anolgetic way either. to which he said,
yes I can.

so there ya go..

my sons did ok. they did say the whole bunch spintered up into groups.
they are'nt family. they only tolerate each other. (its ridiculas)

they were offended though. nothing worse than just being tolerated.

thank you for praying.

please continue to pray for a good job for me,
a new home, and it all just comes together that the Lord would just open the door.

thanks!

[a.baker]

Still praying for you :hug: :pray: