bye bye band!

[a.baker]

Husband is finally out of the band. There was a huge issue today. I tried to tell him months ago (actually the last 3 yrs. or so) that only one of the guys was a true friend and the rest were not. So finally something happened today and after 10 years the band is done. :): Saturdays are still all his to do with what he pleases, but I am glad to see he is no longer devoted to something that brings nothing but problems every time. A hobby should be enjoying not stressful. :nod:

[CoreIssue]

Easy to get locked in. Disappointing to find out reality.

[a.baker]

Yup my husband wouldn't listen to me until the guy flat out told him what I have been saying this whole time. I guess he needed to hear it from them and not from me. Now he's angry. I just wanted to tell him before so he wouldn't get hurt, but sometimes it doesn't work out that way. They have been friends for 15 years. The one guy is so in love with himself that he just told them he's not best friends not even friends at all. Funny 2 of them stayed behind and practiced with that one guy. I told my husband that speaks for the other 2 to. The real true friend is the one that got hit hard (not literally) and my husband and him left together. He said o.k. I am done with the band. He never said that before.I think, finally you stuck up for yourself and left with your true friend. It's refreshing.

[kay-gee]

It happens all the time. Music is the strangest passion on the planet. Every thing is all fun and games until human ego gets involved. Encourage him to just move on and start or join another band.
all the best...

[Jessie]

I'm glad hes out of it, and I pray he finds something he can really enjoy without all the drama! its sad it had to happen that way!

[kay-gee]

any prospects?

all the best...

[a.baker]

No nothings has changed yet. The one band member had kinda said oh well. I tell you what he is going to severely pay for his attitude one day with loneliness. He is one that is full of vein and has materialistic values and judges people who don't have money very wrong. It's like he has looked into the mirror so many times it's made him blind. Oh so much more goes with it. With my husband I think he is still in the process talking to the other 2. The one that got hit hard I think he has no interest in starting anything back up with the other 2. My husband is trying to be the glue. (5 band members)

[kay-gee]

If your husband is a good front man, that is the most important part. Should be able to attract some players. A great band really only needs 3 or 4, if each is real good at what they do. it's gotta kinda bum him out a little. It's a great outlet. Has he ever asked you to wite for the band. Your poetry is good.
all the best...

[kay-gee]

Nothing to do with band but I wanted to say that our guava tree is bearing like crazy so we're having fresh guavas every day! mmmm
all the best...

[a.baker]

Guavas are good! No the drummer the one who is starting all the problems always wrote for the band.

[kay-gee]

So if you wrote the songs, perhaps you could steer the music in a more positive direction.
all the best...

[a.baker]

Maybe, but the band members including my husband like weird bands like Dream Theater, which if you can imagine it's very dramatic with guitar all over the place. Now with the drummer gone if they continue they will probably go in that direction. I think the music is boring because it's too dramatic. A lot of it is the guitar trying to tell the story and there is a lot of lead guitar . I think it's music mostly for guitarists to really understand because of it's complexity. They like to be a complex band with cords and the way the whole thing just fits together. They like to sing about politics and bad relationships and they are all anti religion. So I am sure if I even saw them today (it's been months) they wouldn't even give me room to have casual conversation because they know I have changed and they sneer at the thought and laugh. One of them came over to my house about 2 months ago (only one I have seen in months) and knew how I changed, and made it a point to pretend he didn't know, to go on with his own self doing. It was very disrespectful and he knew it and thought it was entertaining. I just kept quiet and went on to do my own thing. Not much support from my husband on this one. I think I made a statement without having to say a word in a humble way. My husband acts very different when around them guys. He is very defensive when talking about them too. I always try to bring things up in a very understanding respectful way. I tell him what no one else will. I guess it's my way of trying to protect him because I care for him much. Too many times I see him struggle because he didn't listen to the advice he was prewarned about. But it's beyond me. All I can do is love him and hope one day he will listen. Listen to God. He knows the whole bible very well. I try to warn him many times of his friends and each time he gets burned because he doesn't listen to me. He wants to support them I guess. So I personally wish he would move on because they are a very bad influence on him and they encourage him to keep on the way he is (only with certain things). The things his friends are involved in on every day basis's are filled with very bad morals. I wish I could steer even just one of them into something positive, but what they enjoy and choose to listen to is beyond me. It will only take prayer and one much more full of wisdom and knowledge than I have. Lets see one of them their conscience is gone and he feels not much feeling. The other is consumed by sick sick humor thats plain not funny very disturbing ( I won't mention much more than this, his point of focus is women, children and babies). The other (drummer) thinks that a god doesn't even exist and gets so very angry if you mention God or Jesus. And the other is about to marry a girl who is a wican and verbally abusive to her kids. That one also grew up in a life with parents who were into a very weird doctrine of Christianity. Almost one that was another Jesus or another god, so I guess I wouldn't call it Christianity. Than his parents divorced and his sister claims to of been possessed. Not to mention everyones morals and extra curricular activities. I know this reply is long but I thought I would paint a picture some what. Much more to the guys than that I guess I would say.

[Jessie]

if what hes into is what I'm thinking of....
its really bad. and anything goes .

theres a district in seattle thats like this.

its a whole nother world.